PAIGE PATTERSON USED GOD'S WORD TO PROTECT MEN WHO BEAT & CHEAT ON THEIR WIVES (#MeToo)

PAIGE PATTERSON USED GOD'S WORD TO PROTECT MEN WHO BEAT & CHEAT ON THEIR WIVES (#MeToo):

PATTERSON IS NOW BEING ASKED TO STEP DOWN BUT HOW MANY WOMEN & CHILDREN'S LIVES DID HE RUIN?

CHURCHES ARE NOTORIOUS FOR PROTECTING ABUSIVE HUSBANDS BECAUSE MEN BRING IN MONEY.

GOD DOES NOT ENDORSE THE PRACTICE OF MEN BEATING & CHEATING ON THEIR WIVES OR ABUSING CHILDREN.

SO WHY DOES THE CHURCH?

I BELIEVE IN PRAYER BUT MEN WHO BEAT OR KILL THEIR WIVES SHOULD GO TO JAIL.

THIS INCLUDES MEN WHO ARE CHURCH LEADERS AND MURDERED THEIR WIVES BUT CLAIMED THOSE WOMEN "DIED OF A STROKE".

MEN WHO HABITUALLY CHEAT ON THEIR WIVES SHOULD NOT BE CHURCH LEADERS.

I BELIEVE IN PRAYER BUT MEN WHO SLEEP WITH THEIR DAUGHTERS, GRANDDAUGHTERS OR NIECES SHOULD GO TO JAIL.

LET THE WRATH OF GOD FALL UPON EVERY CHURCH THAT LEFT VULNERABLE WOMEN & CHILDREN IN DANGER JUST TO KEEP MONEY COMING IN.


Post Sources: Fox News, Get Religion, Youtube


******* Southern Baptist leader Paige Patterson removed over complaints of 'dangerous' advice to abuse victims


Paige Patterson, a prominent Southern Baptist leader, has been removed from his position as president of a Texas seminary following allegations that he made abusive and demeaning comments to women.

Patterson, 75, has been heavily criticized over his past comments about women. According to The Washington Post, he encouraged abused women to stay with their husbands, implored female seminarians to look more attractive and commented on an “attractive” teenage girl’s appearance.

Patterson, a former president of the Southern Baptist Convention, also allegedly told a rape victim to forgive her assailant and not report the assault to police, a woman told The Washington Post earlier this week.

Patterson was removed from his position as president of the Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary (SWBTS) in Fort Worth, Texas, by its board of trustees, according to an online statement.

The SWBTS board of trustees said it has appointed Patterson to the position of president emeritus, which includes compensation, after a 14-hour meeting. He and his wife will still be allowed to live on campus at the Baptist Heritage Center as “theologians-in-residence,” the statement added.

The move comes after more than 3,200 Southern Baptist women signed a public letter to the SWBTS, saying they were “grieved by the dangerous and unwise counsel given by Dr. Patterson to women in abusive situations.”

“This pattern of discourse is unbefitting the sober, wise and sound character required of an elder, pastor and leader,” the letter read. “It fails in the call to protect the helpless, the call of Christ to love our neighbor as ourselves and the biblical standard of sexual purity.”

“We cannot defend or support Dr. Patterson’s past remarks. No one should,” the women continued. “The fact that he has not fully repudiated his earlier counsel or apologized for his inappropriate words indicates that he continues to maintain positions that are at odds with Southern Baptists and, more importantly, the Bible’s elevated view of womanhood.”

Others, too, called for Patterson’s removal.

“I don’t have an axe to grind or an agenda to push,” tweeted Clint Pressley, pastor of Hickory Grove Baptist Church in Charlotte, North Carolina. “Regrettably I don’t think there is any other way to start healing, outside of Paige Patterson’s departure. It’s a dark day for us.”

Earlier this month, Patterson issued an apology to “every woman who has been wounded by anything I have said that was inappropriate or that lacked clarity.” He added that he denounces “any form of abuse,” from physical violence to sexual misconduct to threats.

“Please forgive the failure to be as thoughtful and careful in my extemporaneous expression as I should have been,” Patterson said.

Another online petition, which defends Patterson against the “malicious attacks,” has nearly 600 signatures.

Patterson rose to prominence in the 1970s while leading a conservative takeover of the Baptist Convention. He helped pass resolutions banning women as pastors and taught that women should be submissive to their husbands.

BILL COSBY vs BEVERLY JOHNSON - I BELIEVE HER (NO MORE SHAME) #MeToo

BILL COSBY vs BEVERLY JOHNSON - I BELIEVE HER (NO MORE SHAME) #MeToo:

BILL SEXUALLY ASSAULTED WOMEN FOR DECADES.

MORE MEN WHO USE THEIR POWER TO WRONGFULLY CONTROL AND DISRESPECT WOMEN NEED TO BE EXPOSED.

IT'S NOT ABOUT RACE, IT'S ABOUT ABUSE OF POWER.

IT'S NOT ABOUT BASHING MEN......IT'S ABOUT JUSTICE.

MORE WOMEN NEED TO SPEAK OUT AGAINST MALE ABUSE OF POWER AND SEXUAL ASSAULT EVEN IF IT COST THE WOMEN MONEY & FAME.......SPEAK OUT ANYWAY.

SPEAK OUT ANYWAY EVEN IF THE MEN WHO DID IT TRY TO PAINT YOU AS "MENTALLY UNSTABLE" OR AS "GOLD DIGGERS".

THANK YOU BEVERLY JOHNSON FOR SPEAKING OUT.

FORGIVENESS DOES NOT ELIMINATE CONSEQUENCES.

ESPECIALLY WHEN THE HARMFUL ACT WAS MALICIOUS INTENT.

NO MORE SHAME.


Post Sources: Vanity Fair, ABC, The View, Youtube


****** Bill Cosby Drugged Me. This Is My Story.


Like most Americans, I spent the 60s, 70s, and part of the 80s in awe of Bill Cosby and his total domination of popular culture. He was the first African American to star in a dramatic television series, I Spy, a show my family in Buffalo, New York, always watched. Cosby cut a striking figure on-screen then. He was funny, smart, and even elegant—all those wonderful things many white Americans didn’t associate with people of color. In fact, as I thought of going public with what follows, a voice in my head kept whispering, “Black men have enough enemies out there already, they certainly don’t need someone like you, an African American with a familiar face and a famous name, fanning the flames.”

Imagine my joy in the mid-80s when an agent called to say Bill Cosby wanted me to audition for a role on the The Cosby Show. Cosby played an obstetrician, and he sometimes used models to portray pregnant women sitting in his office waiting room. It was a small part with one or two speaking lines at most, but I wanted in.

I was in the midst of an ugly custody battle for my only child. I needed a big break badly and appearing on The Cosby Show seemed like an excellent way of getting Hollywood’s attention. I’d appeared in one or two movies already, but my phone wasn’t exactly ringing off the hook with acting jobs.

Cosby’s handlers invited me to a taping of the show so I could get the lay of the land and an idea of what my role required. After the taping I met all the cast and then met with Cosby in his office to talk a bit about the hell I’d been through in my marriage. He appeared concerned and then asked what I wanted from my career going forward. He seemed genuinely interested in guiding me to the next level. I was on cloud nine.

I brought my daughter to the next taping I attended. Afterward, Cosby asked if I could meet him at his home that weekend to read for the part. My ex-husband had primary custody of my daughter at the time, and I usually spent my weekends with her. Cosby suggested I bring her along, which really reeled me in. He was the Jell-O Pudding man; like most kids, my daughter loved him. When my daughter and I visited Cosby’s New York brownstone, his staff served us a delicious brunch. Then he gave us a tour of the exceptional multi-level home.

Looking back, that first invite from Cosby to his home seems like part of a perfectly laid out plan, a way to make me feel secure with him at all times. It worked like a charm. Cosby suggested I come back to his house a few days later to read for the part. I agreed, and one late afternoon the following week I returned. His staff served a light dinner and Bill and I talked more about my plans for the future.

After the meal, we walked upstairs to a huge living area of his home that featured a massive bar. A huge brass espresso contraption took up half the counter. At the time, it seemed rare for someone to have such a machine in his home for personal use.

Cosby said he wanted to see how I handled various scenes, so he suggested that I pretend to be drunk. (When did a pregnant woman ever appear drunk on The Cosby Show? Probably never, but I went with it.)

As I readied myself to be the best drunk I could be, he offered me a cappuccino from the espresso machine. I told him I didn’t drink coffee that late in the afternoon because it made getting to sleep at night more difficult. He wouldn’t let it go. He insisted that his espresso machine was the best model on the market and promised I’d never tasted a cappuccino quite like this one.

It’s nuts, I know, but it felt oddly inappropriate arguing with Bill Cosby so I took a few sips of the coffee just to appease him.

Now let me explain this: I was a top model during the 70s, a period when drugs flowed at parties and photo shoots like bottled water at a health spa. I’d had my fun and experimented with my fair share of mood enhancers. I knew by the second sip of the drink Cosby had given me that I’d been drugged—and drugged good.

[Editor’s Note: Cosby’s attorneys did not respond to Vanity Fair’s requests for comment.]

My head became woozy, my speech became slurred, and the room began to spin nonstop. Cosby motioned for me to come over to him as though we were really about to act out the scene. He put his hands around my waist, and I managed to put my hand on his shoulder in order to steady myself.

As I felt my body go completely limp, my brain switched into automatic-survival mode. That meant making sure Cosby understood that I knew exactly what was happening at that very moment.

“You are a motherfucker aren’t you?”

That’s the exact question I yelled at him as he stood there holding me, expecting me to bend to his will. I rapidly called him several more “motherfuckers.” By the fifth, I could tell that I was really pissing him off. At one point he dropped his hands from my waist and just stood there looking at me like I’d lost my mind.

What happened next is somewhat cloudy for me because the drug was in fuller play by that time. I recall his seething anger at my tirade and then him grabbing me by my left arm hard and yanking all 110 pounds of me down a bunch of stairs as my high heels clicked and clacked on every step. I feared my neck was going to break with the force he was using to pull me down those stairs. It was still late afternoon and the sun hadn’t completely gone down yet. When we reached the front door, he pulled me outside of the brownstone and then, with his hand still tightly clenched around my arm, stood in the middle of the street waving down taxis.

When one stopped, Cosby opened the door, shoved me into it and slammed the door behind me without ever saying a word. I somehow managed to tell the driver my address and before blacking out, I looked at the cabbie and asked, as if he knew: “Did I really just call Bill Cosby ‘a motherfucker’?”

Why that was even a concern of mine after what I’d just been through is still a mystery to me? I think my mind refused to process it.

The next day I woke up in my own bed after falling into a deep sleep that lasted most of the day. I had no memory of how I got into my apartment or into my bed, though most likely my doorman helped me out.

I sat in there still stunned by what happened the night before, confused and devastated by the idea that someone I admired so much had tried to take advantage of me, and used drugs to do so. Had I done something to encourage his actions?

In reality, I knew I’d done nothing to encourage Cosby but my mind kept turning with question after question. It took a few days for the drug to completely wear off and soon I had to get back to work. I headed to California for an acting audition. Not long after arriving, I decided I needed to confront Cosby for my own sanity’s sake. I thought if I just called him, he would come clean and explain why he’d done what he had.

I dialed the private number he’d given me expecting to hear his voice on the other end. But he didn’t answer. His wife did. A little shocked, I quickly identified myself to her in the most respectful way possible and then asked to speak to Bill. Camille politely informed me that it was very late, 11:00 P.M. and that they were both in bed together.

I apologized for the late call and explained that I was in Los Angeles and had forgotten about the three-hour time difference. I added that I would call back tomorrow.

I didn’t call back the next day or any other day after that. At a certain moment it became clear that I would be fighting a losing battle with a powerful man so callous he not only drugged me, but he also gave me the number to the bedroom he shared with his wife. How could I fight someone that boldly arrogant and out of touch? In the end, just like the other women, I had too much to lose to go after Bill Cosby. I had a career that would no doubt take a huge hit if I went public with my story and I certainly couldn’t afford that after my costly divorce and on going court fees.

For a long time I thought it was something that only happened to me, and that I was somehow responsible. So I kept my secret to myself, believing this truth needed to remain in the darkness. But the last four weeks have changed everything, as so many women have shared similar stories, of which the press have belatedly taken heed.

Still I struggled with how to reveal my big secret, and more importantly, what would people think when and if I did? Would they dismiss me as an angry black woman intent on ruining the image of one of the most revered men in the African American community over the last 40 years? Or would they see my open and honest account of being betrayed by one of the country’s most powerful, influential, and beloved entertainers?

As I wrestled with the idea of telling my story of the day Bill Cosby drugged me with the intention of doing God knows what, the faces of Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown, Eric Garner, and countless other brown and black men took residence in my mind.

As if I needed to be reminded. The current plight of the black male was behind my silence when Barbara Bowman came out to tell the horrific details of being drugged and raped by Cosby to the Washington Post in November. And I watched in horror as my longtime friend and fellow model Janice Dickinson was raked over the coals for telling her account of rape at Cosby’s hands. Over the years I’ve met other women who also claim to have been violated by Cosby. Many are still afraid to speak up. I couldn’t sit back and watch the other women be vilified and shamed for something I knew was true.

When I sat down to write my memoir in 2013, I pondered if I should include my Cosby experience. I didn't want to get involved in a he-said/she-said situation. Now that other women have come forward with their nightmare stories, I join them.

Finally, I reached the conclusion that the current attack on African American men has absolutely nothing to do at all with Bill Cosby. He brought this on himself when he decided he had the right to have his way with who knows how many women over the last four decades. If anything, Cosby is distinguished from the majority of black men in this country because he could depend on the powers that be for support and protection.

I had to use my voice as a sister, mother, and grandmother, and as a woman who knows that, according to the C.D.C., nearly one in five women has been sexually assaulted at some time in her life, and that women of color face an even higher attack rate.

In part because of what happened to me nearly 30 years ago, I have agreed to serve on the board of the Barbara Sinatra Center for Abused Children. The experience has been as humbling as it has been rewarding. Many of the young children I work with have been sexually abused and I watch in awe of their bravery as they work to recover and feel better.

How could I be any less brave?

(Beverly Johnson was a top model during the 70s and 80s and was the first African American woman to appear on the cover of American Vogue in 1974.)

LINDSAY SAUNDERS-VELEZ, 20 (TRANSGENDER WOMAN) FORCED INTO MEN’S PRISON & RAPED

LINDSAY SAUNDERS-VELEZ, 20 (TRANSGENDER WOMAN) FORCED INTO MEN’S PRISON & RAPED:

COLORADO JUDGE SENT LINDSAY BACK TO MEN’S PRISON AFTER PREVIOUS RAPE.

I DON’T SUPPORT GAY/ LGBTQ RIGHTS BUT THIS IS INHUMANE AND WRONG.

LINDSAY WAS BORN MALE, PLACED IN FOSTER CARE AND HAS LIVED LIFE AS A FEMALE SINCE AGE 4.

I’M SORRY BUT THE JUDGE IN COLORADO IS WRONG.

REGARDLESS OF GENDER LINDSAY IS STILL A HUMAN BEING WITH INALIENABLE RIGHTS.


Sources: AP, The Independent, TIME, Yahoo News, Youtube


**** Transgender woman 'raped at men's prison' hours after judge blocked move


A transgender inmate says she was raped at a men’s prison hours after a judge threw out her request to block corrections officers from keeping her in a disciplinary unit.

Lindsay Saunders-Velez claims she had been threatened, harassed and assaulted since entering Colorado’s prison system last spring for violating her plea deal in a menacing case.

The prisoner filed a lawsuit against the state’s corrections agency in July, branding the system “discriminatory and dangerous” for transgender offenders.

Last month, her lawyers requested a judge not send Saunders-Velez to her jail’s “punishment pod” for a disciplinary infraction, saying she could end up with inmates who had tormented her.

The judge said the attorneys failed to prove an imminent risk, and rejected their request .

However, the 20-year-old was attacked during her time in the pod and needed more than a week in the infirmary recover, according to her attorney, Paula Greisen.

“This issue is not going to go away,” she said: “We’re going to fight it until these individuals are treated with the respect they deserve.”

Federal law requires prisons to individually asses where to house each transgender person, said Demoya Gordon, an attorney with LGBTQ+ advocacy group Lambda Legal’s transgender rights project.

But, she added, almost all facilities still housed inmates based on their genitalia or birth gender, resulting in many transgender women being abused or raped during their sentence.

Saunders-Velez entered Colorado’s foster care system as a child, then spent years in its youth corrections system, according to her attorneys and court records.

The prisoner says she has been “out as a trans female” since the age of four and was diagnosed with gender dysphoria in 2016, beginning hormone treatments in 2017.

Her lawsuit states that it was after she entered an adult prison on a three-year jail term in May last year and was sent to Colorado Territorial Correctional Facility that her problems with other inmates began.

Court records detail incidents in which male prisoners frequently pulled down a privacy screen shielding Saunders-Velez from view as she used the bathroom in her cell.

She said other prisoners threatened her, and in December she reported an inmate sexually assaulted her during a brief transfer to another Colorado prison.

“To escape,” Saunders-Velez swallowed razors and was sent to a hospital before being reassigned to “territorial”, her attorneys said.

Prison staff denied her requests to be called Lindsay and to be identified with female pronouns, according to the complaint, as well as refusing requests to be searched by a woman.

The most recent Bureau of Justice statistics from 2012 suggest around 3,200 inmates in America’s state and federal prisons identified as transgender.

Some 40 per cent of transgender inmates reported being a victim of abusive sexual contact by another inmate or a staff member, 10 times the rate among the general prison population.

Several authorities, including the San Francisco and New York City jail systems, have begun to house transgender prisoners by the gender they identify as.

In Colorado, at least one other inmate is suing the corrections department over its treatment of transgender people. The agency said it was unable to comment on ongoing litigation.

ANDREA CONSTAND vs BILL COSBY (USING POWER TO PREY ON WOMEN): #MeToo/ TRUTH PREVAILS

ANDREA CONSTAND vs BILL COSBY (USING POWER TO PREY ON WOMEN): #MeToo

TRUTH PREVAILS.

GOD IS EXPOSING MEN WHO USE THEIR POWER, RANK & MONEY TO ABUSE WOMEN.

GOD IS ALSO EXPOSING MARRIED MEN WHO BULLY & HUMILIATE THEIR WIVES TO COVER UP ADULTERY.

U.S. MILITARY VETS WHO ABUSE THEIR WIVES & SEXUALLY PREY ON WOMEN ARE NOT EXEMPT.

FEMALE DOCTORS WORKING FOR VA HOSPITALS OFTEN SHIELD VETS WHO ABUSE THEIR WIVES & PREY ON WOMEN........THIS NEEDS TO BE EXPOSED TOO.

TIME'S UP.


Post Sources: New York Times, Youtube


****** Andrea Constand Makes First Statement Since Bill Cosby’s Conviction: ‘Truth Prevails’


Andrea Constand, the woman whose sexual assault complaint against the television icon Bill Cosby led to his conviction, broke her long public silence with a short Twitter message Friday thanking the local community.

“A very profound and heartfelt thank you to the Commonwealth of PA, Montgomery County, for their service and sacrifices,” she wrote, seemingly addressing the district attorney’s office and the jury that on Thursday convicted Mr. Cosby of drugging and sexually assaulting Ms. Constand.

“Congratulations,” she added. “Truth prevails.”

Following a high-profile trial like Mr. Cosby’s, the vindicated party traditionally makes the media rounds, appearing to discuss the case on the “Today” show or “Good Morning America.” Ms. Constand has not yet done so.

Outside the courtroom, where Ms. Constand testified that Mr. Cosby had drugged and molested her at his home in 2004, she has been reluctant to speak about the case. That may be due, in part, to the nondisclosure agreement she signed as part of her $3.38 million settlement she reached with Mr. Cosby in 2006.

Last year, a judge ruled that Mr. Cosby could pursue a lawsuit against Ms. Constand based on two Twitter posts she wrote in 2014.
(“I won’t go away, there is a lot more I will say,” she wrote in one.) But as the #MeToo movement against sexual abuse has gained influence, women who have agreed to settlements with powerful men — including Harvey Weinstein, Bill O’Reilly and Donald J. Trump — have broken their nondisclosure agreements, arguing that speaking out was more important.

Ms. Constand’s lawyer, Dolores Troiani, said by phone on Friday that she and her client were evaluating their options and the enforceability of the contract with Mr. Cosby.

“Obviously everyone in the world has sent me an email or text, but we’re just stepping back and seeing where we’re going to go,” Ms. Troiani said, referring to the extensive media requests for interviews with Ms. Constand. “I think we’re taking a breather, for one.”

At a news conference after the verdict on Thursday, Ms. Constand stood by, letting the Montgomery County district attorney, Kevin Steele, and Kristen Gibbons Feden, the special prosecutor on the case, speak about its importance.

Mr. Steele commended Ms. Constand for fighting through two trials. “She has been a major factor in a movement that has gone in the right direction, finally,” he said.

WOMEN IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS ARE OFTEN MADE TO APPEAR AS BEING "CRAZY"

WOMEN IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS ARE OFTEN MADE TO APPEAR AS BEING "CRAZY":

OUR JUSTICE SYSTEM ALLOWS THIS TO PROTECT MEN WHO BEAT THEIR WIVES & TO SILENCE WOMEN.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AFFECTS WOMEN PHYSICALLY AND PSYCHOLOGICALLY.

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS WHEN A MAN CONTROLS A WOMAN'S MIND WITH HIS FISTS.

HUSBANDS WHO BEAT THEIR WIVES ARE "REWARDED" WITH LIGHT SENTENCES.

GOD IS THE ONLY REAL JUDGE WHO PUNISHES MEN WHO ABUSE WOMEN WHEN COURTS REFUSE TO.


Sources: Daily Beast


****** Here Is the Powerful Statement a Wife Read Aloud to the Court and Her Abusive Husband


For ten years, Neha Rastogi says, she was abused by her husband, Abhishek Gattani. But despite her recordings recording some of that abuse, the Santa Clara District Attorney’s office let him plead no contest to offensive touching and felony accessory after the fact and agreed to a deal in which he would serve less than two full weeks in jail. Here is Rastogi’s full statement, as written, that she read aloud while Judge Allison Marston Danner was on vacation, asking her to change the terms of the prosecutor’s deal:

"Your honor,

I appreciate this opportunity given to me to speak about my abuse at the hands of Abhishek Gattani, I thank for this time given to me to voice my concerns, and requests to you and this court in the case of People vs. Abhishek Gattani. I apologize that my statement is a bit long but I've been effectively silenced since the day I married Abhishek and now throughout these criminal court proceedings and this is my one and only chance to speak … so please bear with me.

First I’d like to bring to your attention a few facts, which I feel, have not been considered in this case while coming up with the plea deal granted to and accepted by Mr. Gattani.

I had been married to Abhishek Gattani for 10 years, and being battered by him for the entire duration. He hit me, multiple times during each incident on my face, arms, head, belly, pulled my hair and abused me and called me a bitch, whore, slut, bastard and much more in my language.

Towards the last 4 years of our marriage he brainwashed me into admitting that I was a complete disgrace to him and the family we built and that if he was in my place, he would commit suicide out of shame, in other words telling me to commit suicide. He also started to threaten to kill me and when I expressed fear or feeling unsafe with him he called it “my self inflicted depression”.

He was probably a few days away from killing me when I got out of this dangerous and abusive marriage – I had started getting my will done, my life insurance done, in other words started to prepare our child’s future once he kills me. I even mentioned to him that what if this happen to our child if this happens and he said “I will not leave you, I will kill you and then kill myself, our child (not mentioning her name here) is collateral damage”. Abhishek – she is NOT collateral damage - She is the best thing that happened between us and will remain so.

2. Finally on 1st July 2016, I reported abuse to the authorities. Abhishek Gattani was arrested once before on 30 November 2013, as he was beating me punching me in the head and grabbing me from the neck, out in the open (on the street) when our mailman reported his abuse. He was convicted for this violence against me in this very court in 2014.

His first arrest on felony battery charge was reduced to misdemeanor – disturbing the peace on account of POSSIBLE immigration consequences.

The same reason being given by his defense attorney Mr. Paez (who I hired for Abhishek during the first case), this time around to enable reduction and leniency in the plea deal offered to this serial aggressor. I helped Abhishek escape a harsher punishment, because, being from India, I did not know better, I did not understand the American criminal justice system and above all I hoped like a fool that this might bring some change in him.

3. He was also required to take a 52-week anger management class as part of his previous sentence.

4. This time around there is evidence in the form of audio and video clips which clearly show and prove that Abhishek was hitting me (repetitively hitting me on the face and body), there are videos of him threatening to stab me 45 times and many of these videos show this abuse towards and happening in the presence of our then 2.5 year old child. There is also evidence in the form of pictures of bruises obtained from these beatings. There is also evidence of his parents confirming (over a video recording) to his physical abuse against them (both father and mother) as well as Abhishek’s younger sister.

5. Abhishek and I have a now ~3.5 year old daughter together who has been exposed to and has been impacted from, his abusive – aggressive behavior.

YH, this is the second time his abuse towards me has been reported to the state, but it is not the second time he has committed these crimes. Our child (3.5 years now) and I have taken many years of abuse, of which 3 years of abuse post his conviction in the matter from 2013. I hoped that he could change his ways and that I could give a complete family to our child. That hope died on 30th June 2016 and I reported his violent abuse towards our daughter and me on July 1st of 2016.

In these past few months I have tried come to terms with the fact that the man I married … the father of my child … is a horrible human being, and didn't deserve my care or respect or love and now, he doesn’t deserve another second of my mental space given the 10 years I have already wasted on him. He was a mistake and now I need to move on... but I find it difficult to move on when I feel wronged by the DA's office and this court. Honestly I feel fooled not just by a convicted criminal, aggressor, wife beater, batterer, that I unfortunately married - the worst mistake of my life but by this court as well. With all due respect to the system... I stand FOOLED, disgraced and ridiculed as a victim.

I wanted to speak up at the last hearing as well, but I was told today is the right time to do so. Honestly I am not sure why is it so, as it seems it's all done... what's the point of me speaking up now?

I get heard to be ignored? to be told that the system understands the abuse and the impact it has had on our child and me but sorry it is what it is. I was told no jail, no classes, no penalties can change Mr Gattani.

Is this the faith the DA’s office and the court have in the justice being provided in this court? Is that the reason for leniency in such cases? Have we given up on justice? Is that the thinking behind giving him a charge which honestly doesn’t add up to his crime AT ALL?

I am no attorney but I can read and understand English. When I look up the charge: Felony – Accessory after the fact it means: Someone who assisted another 1) who has committed a felony, 2) after the person has committed the felony, 3) with knowledge that the person committed the felony, and 4) with the intent to help the person avoid arrest or punishment.

Please help me understand how is this a charge appropriate to the crimes he has himself admitted to in this very court. By taking the plea deal he has admitted to hitting me, he has admitted to threatening to kill me, he has admitted that he hit me and mentally tortured me throughout my pregnancy and his abuse resulted in me making multiple trips to the ER even as late as 8 months into my pregnancy.

Please advise me how does accessory after the fact apply to a criminal like him? Who was he assisting while torturing me … who is that criminal, because if it wasn’t him shouldn’t this court be searching for that person. Please let me assure you as a victim of his abuse, you need to look no further – HE did it. His charge should be Felony – battery with the intent to harm if not kill.

The second charge on him is a “Misdemeanor – offensive touching”? I didn’t even need to look this one up, as it made me laugh when then I realized that I was laughing at myself, I was the joke here. “Offensive touching!!!”

Please explain me is it offensive touching when a 8 month pregnant women is beaten and then forced to stand for the entire night by her husband, is it offensive touching when a mother nursing her 6 day old child is slapped on her face by her husband because he thinks she is not latching properly with the child, is it offensive touching when a women is flung to the floor and repetitively kicked in her belly, is it offensive touching when a women is slapped 9 times by her husband until she agrees to everything he is saying and then gets hit again for not agreeing with it sooner … is it offensive touching - I call it terrorism … That’s how I felt – terrorized and controlled held hostage by the fear of pain, humiliation and assault on my being and my daughter’s.

I feel disgraced by the charges – 3 years of abuse towards our child and 10 years of abuse towards me has equated to 15 days of his life in jail.

The system has shown me that concerns over Abhishek’s immigration status has completely trampled rights of my daughter and my own. How is it that this is the second time he has been convicted of Domestic Violence and this is the charge.

Between the prosecution and defense, I've been marginalized and honestly insulted. What I have suffered at Abhishek's hands has become insignificant in favor of considerations for Abhishek's job, immigration status. What about our child, what about me? We both experienced domestic violence from Abhishek, yet our voices cannot reach the authorities.

The plea deal given to him is not punishment for his doings rather an encouragement for continuing his ways, with just one lesson to be learnt by him – to keep it under the covers next time and that he should silence the next victim and not just control her. He was shown leniency by this court in his previous case, but the same shown this time around, stands no basis. Seriously, how many chances does a grown up, educated, CEO of a tech startup need to understand that he is not to hit anyone or else he will have consequences like going to jail, or even being deported.

This person preys on the mere perception of weakness and that’s what the system is exhibiting today.

Multiple times in the past, Mr Gattani would come back home from Cuberon, his startup, after having an argument with his co-founder and tell me, “you and my co-founder (who shall remain unnamed) are the same – lazy, empty promise makers, Positive fools, with no results. I can’t trust him.” Mr Gattani, had the same remarks about friends and even successful, accomplished people as the main investors in his very startup just because they would show empathy and not aggression when approaching a challenging situation, calling them free loaders and lucky by being at the right place at the right time.

Who is the free loader today if not him, and who is offering this leniency – the judicial system. This to him isn’t equality or rights but sign of weakness, which he takes advantage of. He has physically and mentally tortured his parents, his sister, his wife and now his 2.5 yr old daughter too – all because he looked at our values and morals and care for him as a sign of weakness, which he could misuse.

He named our strength as our weakness and continuously took advantage of it. He will do the same here and I stand terrified of the consequences of that as a mother, as again a future victim and for all those who he would prey on in the times to come.

I am appalled by the sentence he is getting.

I believe justice will come to him, if not through this court then by God's decree on account of his doings but I do stand disappointed here as a law abiding citizen of the most powerful country in the world, feeling unprotected and ridiculed by a CRIMINAL… who is here pleading guilty for the same crimes committed against the same victim in just 3 years of the first REPORTED incident while ON probation.

The reason I speak out now, is that, no anger management classes can help a man who doesn’t think he did anything wrong when he HIT and ABUSED others to control them, once someone escapes their guilt the only thing that stops them is serious consequences – which is a rightful conviction. I see that the defense council has requested his felony charge to be reduced to a misdemeanor in the future. This is the same criminal who has already fooled the system for 3 years after being convicted for the same crimes. I can almost confirm he will do the same again.

I believe in God and I will pray that we don't come back here in this very situation because this court was lenient with this convicted felon with a criminal history... I pray that I am proven wrong as peace is cheap at such cost... but if I am proven right this moment will stand very dark and very heavy in the minds of all of us who could have done something to stop that from happening.

I don’t understand the legal proceedings but I do seriously object to his request for getting to serve county jail post completion of the 5 month sheriff’s program. Is this a joke?.

This criminal is asking for a chance to wrap up his business???? Really are we enrolling him in a spa of giving him a punishment for abusing his wife and child for 10 years.

We are looking for the convenience of this felon who forced me multiple times to resign from my job (all recorded and provided as evidence) or else he will continue his abuse in front of our then 2.5-year-old child and not allow her to go to sleep … this leniency for a person of his morals and virtues?

I cannot articulate my despair at this treatment of his crimes. It’s as if we are giving him a slap on his wrist because he got caught … this is barely any consequence for him for ruining the childhood of our daughter and the 10 best years of my life.

I believe you as the judge in this case have the power to rethink what is being given away here in the name of equal rights. Rights come with consequences too.

I believe you have the power to stop any further leniency then already being given to him by the DA’s office. I believe you have the power to restore some faith in my heart that I wasn’t completely made a fool of, by this criminal and the judicial system.

I request you the following:

1. no jail credits are given to him and he serves full sentence of 30 days in county jail (CJ),

2. he be arrested today and made to serve his CJ sentence from right now; and

3. his Felony charge NEVER be reduced to a misdemeanor.

I request this to you knowing fully well that YOU have the power to do so. Rest, please do what you think is right and would help you sleep tonight.
Once again, thank you for this opportunity to state the facts and voice my disappointment. Thank you for listening to me everyone."

CHARLOTTE POLICE DEVISE NEW PLAN TO REDUCE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN (TAKE HEED DC & MARYLAND)

CHARLOTTE POLICE DEVISE NEW PLAN TO REDUCE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN (TAKE HEED DC & MARYLAND):

IT'S TIME TO STOP COVERING UP FOR MEN WHO BEAT THEIR WIVES OR GIRLFRIENDS REGARDLESS OF HOW "NICE" THOSE MEN MAY APPEAR.

"NICE" MEN DO NOT BEAT UP THEIR WIVES OR GIRLFRIENDS.

"NICE" MEN DO NOT COMMIT ADULTERY ON THEIR WIVES.

"NICE" MEN CAN NOT BE PROVOKED TO BEAT UP THEIR WIVES OR GIRLFRIENDS.

SO STOP LYING TO PROTECT THESE VIOLENT MEN WHO DESERVE PRISON TIME, INCLUDING MEN WHO ATTEND CHURCH.

MANY CHURCHES PROTECT WIFE BEATERS WITHIN THEIR CONGREGATION.

WOULD JESUS PROTECT A WIFE BEATER??


Sources: Charlotte Observer, ABC News, Australia Today, Psychology Today, Youtube


***** A quarter of Charlotte’s homicide cases involve domestic violence. This plan may help.


About a quarter of the city’s 84 homicide victims so far in 2017 have died through domestic violence, according to Charlotte-Mecklenburg police.

The victims have included a UNC-Charlotte professor, at least one pregnant woman and, on Saturday, a recent immigrant and her mother-in-law. Police said her husband shot and killed both women, and then himself, in an east Charlotte apartment.

In the next few years, city leaders hope to save lives and reduce Charlotte’s domestic violence overall by opening a family justice center, based on a model that has worked well in other cities, CMPD Sgt. Craig Varnum said.

“Instead of the victim having to go across the street to talk to a Safe Alliance advocate, down the road to talk to someone at Community Support Services to get counseling for their child, coming here to talk to a police officer and across the street to get a 50B (protective order), they go to one place,” where representatives from all those agencies will be available, he said.



The center is only in planning stages, but Varnum said he expects it will open within three years. He said it’s too early to estimate how much the center will cost.

Communities around the state and country have seen big reductions in domestic violence after opening family justice centers, Varnum said. In San Diego, where the country’s first family justice center opened in 2002, he said domestic violence calls dropped 50 percent during a six-year period. Domestic violence homicides declined, too, he said.

Beyond the key goal of improving victims’ lives, reducing domestic violence will help the city overall, Varnum said. Nearly 40 percent of the 52 homicide suspects identified so far this year have criminal histories including domestic violence, he said.

“We spend more time investigating crimes of domestic violence than any other crime that we respond to,” he said. “We average about 35,000 calls per service per year that are related to domestic violence.” Varnum said about 9,000 of those calls turn into criminal reports every year.

The Buncombe County Family Justice Center opened in Asheville in 2016, and Varnum cited research about what victims in Buncombe County dealt with before the center opened.


In the first three days after a victim asked for help – a request often sparked by a violent, traumatic incident, Varnum said – Buncombe County found that, on average, victims went to eight different locations, spoke with 12 people about their cases and filled out 61 pages of paperwork.

The traveling and bureaucracy are a particular challenge for victims who have come to an unfamiliar place without transportation and who may be accompanied by children, Varnum said. In contrast, the family justice center is meant to be a safe place where victims can get all the help they need.

Laura Lawrence, chief legal officer for Safe Alliance, which helps survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault in Mecklenburg County, will work with Varnum to lead the creation of the new center, she said Wednesday.

So far, the steering committee includes representatives from Pat’s Place Child Advocacy Center, the district attorney’s office, Child and Family Services Center and the county’s Community Support Services, along with Safe Alliance and the police, Lawrence said.

In the new center, Lawrence said victims will meet first with a Safe Alliance representative, who will help them file a protective order and decide what to do next.


Filing protective orders sometimes involves waiting in court for hours, Lawrence said, which can be intimidating and stressful for victims, especially when they have children. As early as March – long before the new center opens – Safe Alliance clients will be able to stay in a safe place and make video calls into the courtroom instead of going in person, Lawrence said.

BEYONCÉ EXPOSES LEMONADE RELATIONSHIPS: ARE YOU IN ONE?

BEYONCÉ EXPOSES LEMONADE RELATIONSHIPS: ARE YOU IN ONE?

HOW MUCH WILL IT COST A WOMAN EMOTIONALLY & MENTALLY TO REMAIN IN AN LEMONADE RELATIONSHIP?

Sources:  Glamour, Billboard, YouTube

***** How Beyoncé's Lemonade Gave Black Women Permission to Be Emotional Without Shame

Almost a year ago, I was in the throes of a heart-wrenching breakup. It broke me. I had anchored my happiness and future into this one man, but, as British-Somali poet Warsan Shire says, you can’t make homes out of human beings. 

The linear, quick grieving process I had hoped for was nowhere in sight; It was long and excruciating. To make matters worse, I was suffering in silence because of prying eyes from our mutual industry peers. 

Finally, 10 months post-heartbreak, the words just poured out of me. I exhaled. Some months later, a woman (one of many he had had in and out of his bed) texted me. She had read my piece and tried to shame me—using my own words with her own dig: “Today is the day. Let go.” That’s the thing about getting emotional and showing your vulnerability—speaking your feelings is no guarantee of empathy. Even from other women. 

But Beyoncé's Lemonade allows black women to be angry and crazy because of that hurt and then to heal once we’ve recognized our power. And this, to me, is the true crux of Beyoncé’s Lemonade: For years, women have been called "crazy" or worse for showing their real emotions—and black women most of all.

women often aren’t allowed to be weak. Breaking is not an option, so we walk around Gucci down to the socks to cover the emotions we're told not to feel. Being given lemons and making lemonade is not only what we’ve always done—it’s what’s expected. 

We aren’t allowed to be angry or loud—even the First Lady got the Angry Black Woman label for expressing herself eloquently. We aren't allowed to be weak. We aren’t allowed to feel depleted. It defies the superhuman strength gene we are believed to carry—there’s a reason medical professionals think we feel less pain. Forget about being bitter. We are meant to be sturdy mules, carrying the weight of the world on our backs. But in private—and with our black girlfriends—we are free. 

Lemonade channels that feeling of freedom, giving black women the space to have intense emotions—to be angry and devastated by hurt—and then to heal. It rips off the mask and affirms that our feelings are valid, that we are powerful.

I wrote on Facebook about Lemonade being the journey of women coming into our own, realizing our power, and letting love be transformative, and a friend, in tears, told me: “Healing is so, so hard.” She said she had finally been able to admit that she was still mourning the dissolution of a five-year relationship. Beyoncé did that for us. She took our hand and said, "I know. I know."

Lemonade takes 11 acts to bring us from Intuition to Redemption, passing Denial, Anger, and Emptiness along the way. Beyoncé understands the transformative power of love in women's lives, and she uses Lemonade as a vessel to show black womanhood in its fullness—the peaks and the valleys. With "I tried to change.

 Closed my mouth more. Prettier, softer, less awake," Beyoncé makes us confront ourselves: How many times have we shrunk or contorted ourselves into bubblier and less-opinionated versions of who we are with the hopes that he’d stay? Bey has been guilty of this very thing. If a successful, beautiful superstar is not immune to shrinking herself for a man, there is no shame for us to have done it. Bey understands. Even she isn't exempt from comparing herself to "Becky with the good hair."

In Anger, Beyoncé is a sight of glory. Wearing a mustard yellow dress—a nod to the orisha Oshun—we see her breaking windows and asking, "What’s worse? Looking jealous or crazy, jealous and crazy? Or like, being walked all over lately...I’d rather be crazy.” Anger is held over black women’s head so much we sit in a pit of guilt just for feeling it, but Beyoncé just laughs through the rage. I imagine her laughing at this idea that women can’t react to the hurt men cause us. Anger fuels the realization of who she is. “Who the fuck you think I is?" she asks. "You ain’t married to no average bitch, boy.” In Apathy, Beyoncé tells us, “I ain’t sorry"—a pointed statement in a world where women seem to always be apologizing, even when we're not in the wrong. “Did he bend your reflection? Did he make you forget your own name?” Beyoncé wants us to remember our own names because it’s not about him. She’s refusing to be sacrificial for love. She’s throwing away victimhood. She is the captain of her own ship. “I’mma keep running ‘cause winners don’t quit themselves.” The pop star wants us to bank on ourselves every single time.

In the end, loving herself is Beyoncé's salvation. “True love brought salvation back in to me," she sings. "Every tear became my remedy.” At the end of Lemonade, black women gather in the kitchen to cook soul food—a healing aid, to be sure—and Jay Z's grandmother describes making lemons out of lemonade. The power in matriarchies and sisterhood are solidified, crucial to our redemption. Loving ourselves will be our own salvation.

This ode to black women—because, truly, that’s what Lemonade is—reflects our own power back to us. That power does not only exist in being strong and confident and composed. That power is deeply connected to our raw emotions and our vulnerability.

I love that Beyoncé shows black women in all our beauty, from the elders to the black futurists (Quvenzhané Wallis and Amandla Stenberg); from the black queer women to Serena Williams; from the civil rights icon Leah Chase to the black mothers of sons slain by police violence; from black women with natural hair to symbolism of West African spiritual orishas. 

She wanted us to see the goddess in ourselves—and for the world to see it too. 

I don’t know if Lemonade is about Beyoncé’s marriage to Jay Z or if she’s channeling emotions through her mother’s public divorce from her father. Maybe it’s both. Maybe it's neither.

 What’s way more important than the speculation is that she used her platform to bring us back to ourselves when we needed a reminder. 

When we need a reminder that our natural curvy hips don’t make us “manly,” she showed us Serena twerking in a bodysuit. 

When we need a reminder that our culture is valuable long before it’s Columbused, she gave us images of black women in cornrows (re: not boxer braids). She reminded us that a black president and his black wife made it into the White House in racist America. 

She reminded us through a country song that there is no box they can place on our talents. She reminded us that we are not just our suffering—joy is always near. She reminded us that we must tell our own stories. 

We must uplift other black women. She reminded us that no matter what they say the work is what will last. She reminded us that sharing our stories—even at their most vulnerable—helps us shed the weight of carrying it all alone.

Beyoncé gave black women permission to be hurt, be angry, cry, doubt ourselves, feel empty, love hard, all without apologies. That our vulnerability is nothing to be ashamed of. And when we’re done feeling, we mustn’t ever forget the god within us. Because on the other side of healing we can move mountains. “If we’re going to heal, let it be glorious.”